CLOSED Grumpy Old Gods 5: Submission Call Deadline Dec. 1st, 2019

Grumpy Old Gods 5

Submission Call for Grumpy Old Gods 5:


We want stories of cantankerous gods, aging heroes, and the occasional mortal caught up in their shenanigans. Small gods, demigods, and gods that the author made up are all welcome. We love it when a writer takes the ‘normal’ form of a God or Goddess and remakes it for the modern world, or conversely, shows a pantheon that’s refusing to adapt. Sparkling dialogue, well-drawn characters, and most of all a real ending with a twist will make our little editing hearts skip a beat. 

We’re looking for stories from 3000-4000 words in length involving gods from any pantheon that doesn’t have a large existing fanbase (we’re pretty fond of living and people who are still worshiping their Gods tend to react badly when you poke fun, no matter how lightly. We have strict rules about not dying. Dead editors don’t put out new anthologies, and dead writers can’t collect royalties…

So… don’t write anything that will make someone want to kill you, or, by extension, us.) 

We much prefer a hopeful, humorous take on the subject and theme. Make the reader chortle, chuckle, or choke on their tea if they drink it at the wrong time. 

These are the stories we want to see in Grumpy Old Gods Volume 5. Be creative with the pantheon. Show us something we haven’t seen before. 

Is that a tall order?


You might even say it is a Herculean task.

But we know our writers are up to it!

Submissions are due December 1st, 2019 with an eye to releasing the anthology late January 2020.


Required: Must Have Grumpy Old Gods 5 in the Subject Line of your email. This helps us wade through the correspondence tsunami and spot G5 among the hundreds of emails. 

So PLEASE be specific. Seriously. We’re begging you guys.

Must include a bio of the author (not that we’re going to judge anyone by their bio…it just makes putting the book together a lot easier if all the information is in the same place). 

No poetry. No plays. No matter how amazing your poems are (and some of them have been) we simply don’t have a payment structure in place for something that short. We might eventually have an unpaid poetry venue on the blog. As for screenplays/plays… we don’t have the marketing staff to branch out, and they obviously don’t work in an anthology. 

Genre: Speculative Fiction.

Deadline: December 1st, 2019

Payment: Royalty Split

What is Speculative Fiction?

Well, Wikipedia says… “It encompasses the genres of science fiction, fantasy, science fantasy, horror, alternative history, and magic realism.” In our case, we want a mythological element, but feel free to pick and choose where you set your story. We’re as likely to pick out Grumpy Old Gods in Space as we are to enjoy a nice Viking battle set in a Steampunk Edwardian era that never was. 

Most of all, for the love of little green dragons, have fun with it! These stories are meant to be fun for the reader, but it’s our belief that they can’t be for the reader if they aren’t fun for the writer. So, let that inner Muse out! Feed her pixie sticks, and see how much awesomeness she can cram into 4000 words. 

(All Muses must be convinced to write in English since the Editors of this anthology do not speak Ancient Greek, Latin, Sumerian, Phoenician, or Egyptian.) 

Words: 3000-4000

Rating: PG13-PG17

Submission Format:

Word Doc RTF format or PDF
(No Google Docs please, but we’re willing to work with you if you need to submit in a different format, just contact us!) All info including BIOs should be submitted in a Word Doc RTF format, not in the body of the email.

What rights are we asking for?

We’re asking for the exclusive rights to print the stories for one year in the anthology, but the writers will retain everything else. We prefer first-run rights, but judge each story on its own merit. 


All authors who participate in the collection will receive an equal portion of the profit, paid via paypal per the contract. None of the startup costs for the book (book cover, formatting, etc…) will be deducted from the proceeds.


Vanessa Wells , Juneta Key, and Vanessa Finaughty.

Submit to:

Who we are:

Vanessa Wells: Self-professed short story junkie, writer, and editor of anthologies. Storyteller, responsible for the Magus series, the Area 52 short story series, and the Topeka, Tx Chronical cozy mysteries. Editor of three Grumpy Old Gods anthologies with more to come.

Juneta Key: You know her as one of the seven founders and a host of Storytime Quarterly Blog Hop, and one of the nine Admins of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group. She is the author of several short stories and working on two paranormal series and a sci-fantasy space opera. The social media and website skills are strong with this one. Editor of three Grumpy Old Gods anthologies with more to come.

Vanessa Finaughty: A talented editor and fantasy author joining the Stormdance team on July 2019. She has written or edited for magazines, national newspapers in South Africa, Oxford University Press Southern Africa and the International Trade Centre in Geneva, Switzerland, among others. Plus two Grumpy Old Gods anthologies with more to come.

Grumpy Old Gods 5

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